And one time at summer camp....

To head off the summer, we decided to make a summer to do list in efforts to cut down on the constant "I'm bored" statement that causes me to instantly visit a dark place.



Today, the two oldest divas were packed up and shipped off to a local week long overnight summer camp. All is right in the world.



As you can see, their excitement can't be contained. We checked a big one off today....

Confession #1...I spent several hours visiting several stores and buying the much needed essentials for summer camp. Bug spray..check. Swim suit..check. Inhaler..check. Each outfit placed in a ziploc bag with the day of the week to wear it written across it. Despite the numerous lists and reminders that have taken over our house. I still have these moments where I panic and think...oh hell...did I pack their underwear? Confession #2...have I prepared them enough for the world. Yes, you would think they are going off to college. But, I had a rough childhood of bullying and learned at a very early age that girls are mean. So, I contemplate while putting the last of their clothing in the luggage on whether or not I have prepared them for any meanness they may encounter. Though they may drive me crazy, their hearts are so pure and innocent. So, did I tell them what to say if someone makes fun of them? Quickly, I pick my brain for ways they can tell someone to go to hell without using the bad words. Did I stress enough that the worst thing you can do to yourself is to try to fit in. The only words that I find comfort in is what my mom engraved on my soul for the 16 years I had her..."it's cause you're pretty and they're ugly". Yes this was her daily mantra. The older I get, I tell myself that she was talking more about my beauty within of course. On the other hand, my grandmother just resorted to giving me a sharpen pencil to stab the girl. Gotta love a good grandmother.


We pack up the car and a hummingbird is stuck in the garage. If you know me, you know I love hummingbirds...but today??? Really!!! I can't. I scream at the sexy bald fella to grab it with his bare hands. He yells back that he's not going to to get attacked by a hummingbird. The girls are whining...don't let the bird die mommy. Holy hell...I can't do it all. Just kill the damn thing with a broom stick. Did I say that? What kind of mother am I? I am not the hummingbird whisperer, the mine reader, the Kindle Fire Tech support, the physician, they psychiatrist...Today, I am just mama!! I suggest leaving the garage open and that seems to soothe everyone. The girls are anxious and my nerves are shot to shit. The sexy bald fella decides to take an important business call while we head down a road where I leave my children as a sheep amongst the wolves. How dare he...the inconsiderate shit (giggle). My middle child reminds me that she has left her purple pillow. Of course the sexy bald fella tells her the pillow she brought will be just fine. Funny how within seconds of his statement, I have screamed "turn the damn car around now". We head home to get the beloved pillow. As we leave for the second time, I immediately call my pharmacy to ensure my doctor called in my medication because I know that in just a couple of hours my only solace will be the rattle of a pill bottle.


We pull up and I feel a sense of dread....damnit I forgot the sharpened pencils. As I walk my middle child to her cabin, I make her bed while trying to hold back tears. I would not dare traumatize her by crying in front of her new cabin mates. Farryn has been looking forward to this day for weeks. I quickly get her unpacked and move on to my oldest. She has been dreading this day for weeks. I get her unpacked and it hits me...Do they have everything they need? Have I taught them enough? Have I prepared them for the world. No...they need a camp t-shirt. It's imperative that they get a camp t-shirt. The sexy bald fella has realized that I am in a dark place now and the best thing to do is to go get them the damn camp t-shirts?



Ten seconds after this taking this picure...my Farryn, my social butterfly, starts crying. I immediately wish that I had picked up my prescription before this visit. I fumble for a tissue in my purse and tell her all will be find. I try to ignore the fact that I saw a pen in my purpose. A pen is just like a sharpened pencil.



Our family of five say our goodbyes. I wonder how much they will change this week. They are getting older. I wonder what stories they will have to share with me. I wonder if it will be possible to grow another ear to handle the overload of very important information they will share with me when they return...."and one time at summer camp". I take just one more picture. As I scream for the third time to "hug your sister like you mean it, I notice that Brooklyn has on a swim suit. For the last two days, she has worn nothing, but swim suits.



I giggle at this little nonsense walking before me. A camper asks if she is going swimming and she kindly replies "No, I like to wear bathing suits." I will have her for a whole week. No sisters to compete with...just Brooklyn. I decide a trip to the liquor store will be sufficient. We arrive home and to our surprise we are shocked with how quiet a house can get with one kid. The silence quickly ends because our ears are all she has. She decides to show me how to do "skwatches" aka as squats. Bedtime quickly approaches and Brooklyn tells me that she is scared Reagan and Farryn will not think of her.....Damn...right when I think she should get her tested...she lets me know she is human. she crawls in my lap and tells me she is scared her sisters are not thinking about her right now. And I'll be damned....

And what happened then? Well "one time at summer camp" this mama's heart grew three sizes that day.



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